Getting married and being pregnant are two of the greatest experiences you'll ever have! But experiencing them both at the same time can be more than a little overwhelming.
Know how far along you will be by the wedding
Once you confirm with your OBGYN how far along you currently are, calculate how far along you will be at the time of your wedding. Will you just be in the beginning of your first trimester or well into your second or third trimester? Knowing this will help you make some other decisions down the road.
Announcing the pregnancy
Decide how you want to announce your pregnancy. As a rule of thumb, you typically want to wait until the end of your first trimester to announce to all your friends and family. You want to get genetic prescreenings done of your baby first to test for abnormalities and also the risk of miscarriage significantly decreases after your first trimester. Once you feel comfortable, talk it over with your partner about announcing. Do you want to wait and announce it at the wedding or tell everyone immediately. Keep in mind, waiting until the wedding day will likely only be an option if you will be in the first trimester or beginning of your second trimester by the wedding date because otherwise you will likely be heavily showing beforehand. It could also be an option to only tell your closest friends and family before the wedding and then announce to the other guests on the wedding day. Some of your loved ones, parents especially, may not be too happy about being left in the dark for so long.
If you have already bought your dress you need to meet with your alterations person ASAP once you find out how far along you are and how far along you will be by the time of the wedding. The tailor will need to check that there is enough extra fabric to take out the dress to the appropriate measurements. If you purchased your dress from an actual wedding gown shop, they usually encourage you to order one size up so that you have amicable room to work with if you were to gain any weight by the time of the wedding. In these cases, it is typically easier for the seamstress to work with the growing baby bump assuming you are in the earlier stages of the pregnancy. Work out a fittings schedule with them so they can track your measurements and plan accordingly. If your dress was more flowy or a-line style, it will definitely be easier to work with. The fitted mermaid dresses are a little more tricky but talk with your seamstress first before throwing the gown in the trash and starting the dress hunt all over. However, if you will be in the later stages of your second trimester or already in your third trimester by the time of your wedding, you may need to start mentally preparing for the possibility that you may need to start looking at new dresses. Consider swapping out the fitted mermaid dress for a more flowy style. Again, don't make any decisions until meeting with your alterations person first. And remember, every woman's body is different and some women show earlier or later than others. So just be sure to constantly communicate with your OBGYN and seamstress so that you are the best prepared.
Food & Drinks
Go back over your food selections for your wedding. Did you originally choose an ahi tuna appetizer with a medium rare steak entrée? Raw fish and undercooked meat are big no-no's while pregnant. Communicate with your caterer as soon as possible and decide whether you want to change the selections completely or if they could just make something special for you. Also, consider your bar selections. You probably spent a lot of time choosing the beer, wine, and cocktail selections and not much time thinking about your nonalcoholic options. Well now that those are going to be your only options on your wedding day you might want to give that some more thought. Maybe add a nonalcoholic "mocktail" to your signature cocktails menu so that there's some more exciting offerings than just water and soda. Also, if you're planning on doing a champagne toast, make sure you ask whoever is providing your bar service to also stock up on a bottle or two of sparkling cider for you and anyone else who may not want champagne.
Ask for help
Now is the time to really put your wedding party to good use. Being a bridesmaid or groomsman doesn't just mean they get free food, drinks, and gifts. They're also expected to help out with wedding prep and day of tasks. And now that you're pregnant they should be offering to help even more. Don't be shy about assigning tasks and asking for help. You need to be as stress-free as possible and letting your loved ones help take the load off is the best way to do that. Are you making all your wedding favors by hand? Are there a bunch of rentals that need to be picked up the week of the wedding? Message your wedding party and ask who's available to help with what. Everyone should be more than happy to assist, they just might need to be told exactly what to do and when to do it (especially the groomsmen).
Hire a wedding planner
If you haven't done so already, I highly recommend contracting a wedding planner. I of course always advocate for the need of a wedding planner or coordinator but that doubles when the bride is pregnant! It is such a relief to have someone handling the details and logistics and all those stressful elements of the wedding for you. Wedding planning is stressful enough as it is but doing it while your hormones are racing and not having the full industry knowledge is not a great time.
Like I said, being pregnant and planning a wedding are two of the most exciting things that will happen in your life. But experiencing them both at the same time can be understandably overwhelming. I will actually be 15 weeks pregnant by the time of my wedding so this is something I've experienced personally. You have to keep the positive thoughts in the forefront of your mind and try your hardest to let minor frustrations and mishaps roll off your back. You are experiencing two amazing life-changing events and things like the cake or wedding favors should not diminish this incredible journey.
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